sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
