I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I wish you could order shots online.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
