I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
