Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
