i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
