Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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