I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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