I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
