This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
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