turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
We are all done wearing pants today
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