Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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