he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
