if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
