We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
