ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Randomize
