dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
