I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Randomize