Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
