no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
