I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize