So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Tell her she can't have a vagina
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
