I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
