that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Randomize
