i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize