Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Randomize
