I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Randomize
