So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
