Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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