yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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