Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
