fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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