Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Randomize
