I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
