If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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