too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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