I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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