the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
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