I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
