You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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