VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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