No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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