Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
