Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
