Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
