So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Randomize
