Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
