he thought i was a dude.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
