Pappa wants mamma naked
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Randomize
