Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
