VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
